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Unsportsmanlike Conduct - An Emotional Investment

Unsportsmanlike Conduct - Every Monday, Ed The Sports Fan brings you the biggest names over the past week so that you can be thoroughly entertained like when Ed gets emotionally invested midway through the Super Bowl and proceeds to go to emotional highs and lows for Arizona and still ended up being sad.

**It is very labor-intensive to pick out 12 "people" during a given week, especially with football now shutting down till September. Until further notice, you're gonna get as many as I can produce, lol...**


1. Santonio put on for Pittsburgh to become SB XLIII Champs – #10 put on a 2nd half show. I truly believe that Big Ben needs to send this man a new vehicle, a slab of ribs, invest in his 401k, and send a slew of random (clean) strippers to him for the next 6 months. From THE Ohio State University (JAG, Cephas...your welcome) Santonio Holmes made people from Cincinnati, Dayton, Columbus, and Cleveland root for Pittsburgh. (I personally think it was a moral victory for the state of Ohio since the Browns and Bengals are so crappy. You had Santonio from Ohio State, Big Ben from Miami of Ohio, and James Harrison from KENT STATE (WTF) and inside all Browns and Bengals fans wish their teams had the moxie and determination of the Steelers.*) Is Santonio now in the tier of top wide receivers? He looks like a taller, more reliable version of Santana Moss out there. We'll see.

2. Arizona, you got hosed, but you hosed yourselves... – I dunno how to feel about this game. Why is it that offenses want to get real cute in the endzone? I'm looking at you Todd Haley and Kurt Warner. Why are you trying to force a throw into coverage when you have the easiest play of all-time in a fade to Fitz? Did you not see Oklahoma vs. Florida? Throw the ball to Gresham! (I'm sorry that was a flashback...) The point is, you have 18 seconds, why make a hard play on 1st down? Also, there should've been 4-5 players trying to hawk down Harrison on that interception. Only Fitz and Breaston could catch him? Looking at you Anquan Boldin. I can see you in the replay giving up on the play. Chase him! Don't be fooled, that play won the game for the Steelers. Arizona would be up 14-10 at best or 10-10 at worst. Instead it was 17-7 and you had some heart and came back, but that play might haunt Warner forever.

3. Ed lost in the final four in his local Madden tournament... – Just wanted to say that I'm salty about losing. I really shouldn't be, haven't been consistently playing Madden all year. Only played like 17 games online (15-2) and I have NO ONE to play live here in Cincy. In fact, why did I see the dude I lost to ON ESPN IN TURKS & CAICOS PLAYING IN THE MADDEN CHALLENGE FINALS!!! Super salty.

4. Unsportsmanlike Conduct - Ed gets Emotionally Invested... – I don't know if it was just me, but if you don't remember I chose Arizona to win the game last night. Just ran with the underdog, my heart said Cards my mind said Steelers. I wasn't really too emotional, especially when Pittsburgh went up 10-0. Then AZ scored and I still was ok. Then the tipped pass happened. Then AZ started driving...and I saw that they could go into the half with the lead. Then it happened...

I started vocally rooting for the Cardinals.

Then Harrison picked off Warner. Now I was yelling at
the screen. CATCH HIM! GOT DAMMIT! REPLAY THAT!

After that, I figured it was a wrap. I almost forgot the game was on with Bruce Springsteen came on. I realize after the fact that the older, anglo-saxon demographic LOVE Bruce Springsteen. (Evidently, his nickname is The Boss. How the hell did he pull that off?) However, I was momentarily intrigued at the saxophone player who looked like a backup dancer for Bootsy Collins' band.

So after 50 minutes of halftime, Pittsburgh puts another 3 on the board (Burgh left at least 10-17 points on the field) and its 20-7. I'm kinda indifferent, like when you're in the club and a chick as a nice, big, soft booty comes to groove with you, but the face isn't that appealing...yet, you go with it because the booty is SO SOFT and you wonder what kind of Pilates she does...that's how I felt.

Anyway, Arizona drove the field and scored with a Larry Fitzgerald fade. MAYBE YOU SHOULD'VE RAN THAT IN THE FIRST HALF!!!! Then Arizona's defense starts making plays. Big ups to Darnell Dockett, he might be one of the 2-3 best defensive tackles in the league behind Haynesworth and Casey Hampton. He plays like Tommie Harris used to play (yeah I said it) and that safety was HUGE! 20-16 Cardinals.

Arizona kept exposing that middle. What kind of defense was that? That looked like a defense someone plays in Madden. The safeties were about 25 yards off the ball, and the front 7's showing a blitz? Really? I though Dick LeBeau was having a stroke over there...never seen that before. Warner finds Fitz on a deep slant and #11 shows he's got some blaze in 'dem feets' of his. Dammit, AZ might win this boy. 23-20 Cardinals. (Ed ensues to start running laps around the crib, yelling and screaming like he's been a fan since the sandbox.)

Then, I looked on the scoreboard. 2:30 left on the clock....F*CK.


Whatever, you all know the rest. Santonio did a line of coke and got hype on the field. Sadness ensued. I felt like the dude in the Doritos commercial when he gets hit with the crystal ball. I WANT A PROMOTION...WHACK! That's how my left ventricle felt.

That's why sports is a bittersweet symphony. I was on an all-time high, and the Steelers told me that it was the perfect time to say goodbye. To Arizona's title hopes.

Don't make emotional investments like me, or you'll end up sad time and time again. I can't help it. I do this all the time. As a matter of fact, never listen to me when I make predictions. I missed on Arizona, Oklahoma, Tampa Bay, and Memphis in the last 12 months. And I was sad every time.

Ed's NBA prediction - Celtics over Lakers in 7
Ed's NCAA prediction - Wake Forest over Louisville

Just letting you know ahead of time...


-Ed.
www.edthesportsfan.com

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