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The Orlando Magic Will Never Win a Championship

That statement came from me, about 10 hours ago as the Cleveland Cavaliers executed finished off the Atlanta Hawks in Game 1 of their Eastern Conference Semifinal matchup. The question came up that does Orlando have a realistic shot (if they were to get by Boston) to beat Cleveland in a best of 7 series. Being the candid, extroverted, egotistical, uber-maniac that I am, I came back with a simple retort...

Orlando has no chance of beating Cleveland, The Orlando Magic will never win a championship.

(Let the hailstorm of hate, vitriol, and utter angst against Ed begin mercifully)

Now, I wouldn't make a blanket statement like that without some thought behind it (although that's not always the case) and lets look at this point by point.

#1. Their best player on the court doesn't have one legitimate post move or jump shot. Now let's be real, Dwight Howard is the dude. A devout christian, great sense of humor, and is a freak of an athlete. I would want my (future, like in 4-5 years) son to learn a thing or two from D-Ho. So I mean this no disrespect, but Dwight Howard has no post moves, he cannot shoot a 10-12 foot jump shot, and is a horrendous free-throw shooter. We see how he scores his points, alley-oops, put-backs, and dribble-penetration passes from his teammates that lead to a dunk. Who regularly gets the ball in the 4th quarter? Hedo Turkoglu.

#2. They can't afford the most important players on their team. I have shared the philosophy with Ken on this and I'll share it with you. Your 3 best guys should align with who your 3 highest payed players are on your team. I'll give you some examples. In San Antonio: Tim Duncan, Tony Parker, Manu Ginobili. Highest paid, best players. Boston: Ray Allen, Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett. Highest paid, best players. Now, lets look at a couple of teams that don't follow the rule. Philadelphia: Andre Iguoadala, Samuel Dalembert, Elton Brand. Those are the 3 highest paid, however the most important player to that team is definitely Andre Miller (which he's in a walk year, he will be a Portland Trail Blazer). Golden State: Monta Ellis, Andris Biedrins, Jamal Crawford. Yikes! Stephen Jackson's the 5th highest paid on his team, that's a problem.

So here's my point. They originally signed up a core 3 players of Dwight Howard, Rashard Lewis, and Hedo Turkoglu. Jameer Nelson is probably the 2nd or 3rd most important player on the team, yet how good is Jameer Nelson really? Rafer Alston came in the offense looks no different. Rashard Lewis's contract ($109M/6 years) is utterly ridiculous. The simple fact that he gets paid more that Dwight Howard (until at least 2013) is mind-blowing. Furthermore, they cannot afford to resign Turkoglu, who arguably, is the most important player to their team. They don't get out of the first round without him, and they have no one else on that squad that can create their own shot. Its their own fault, they should've never signed Rashard to that horrendous contract in the first place (which they overpaid by AT LEAST $20M) and THEY HAVE NO POWER FORWARD ON THE TEAM!!! Can Dwight Howard get some help on the boards? I know he's Superman and all, but dammit can he get a goon to do his dirty work. He shouldn't have been the one to elbow Dalembert in Game 5, someone like Jermareo Davidson could've chopped Big Sam in the back of the neck and it wouldn't have been a big deal.

#3. They are being coached by legendary porn star Ron Jeremy Stan Van Gundy. Big Shaq attacked the man to no end a couple of months ago. Everyone said, why is he going hard on him (nh) like that? Well, let me ask you all this. When's the last time Stan Van Gundy's coached his team to a big game victory? Ever? Why is it that every single time Orland gets a huge lead, the opposition always finds a way to get back in the game. Orlando was up 28 POINTS against Boston on Monday, yet that game was a Ray Allen 3-pointer way from being 1-0 Boston. Orlando is so obsessed with shooting 3's and playing a run-and-gun offense that they usually let teams get back in the game, great teams do not let that happen. Besides Turk, I see no killer instinct on their team and their attitude reflects their leadership.

Let me say this before I get tons of Orlando hate mail, I actually really like Orlando, but they are just fatally flawed. I can't sit here and be realistic with myself and look at them and say, "They could win it all." It's not happening. Believe in Orlando if you want to, you willing to bet your $20 on it? I didn't think so.



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