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Today's Obituaries - Darrelle Revis (1985-2010)

Darrelle Shavar Revis, 25, passed away on September 19th, 2010. He was born on July 14th, 1985 in Aliquippa, Pennsylvania. Darrelle was widely regarded as the best cornerback in the NFL with the New York Jets. He was chosen by the Jets with the 14th pick in the first round of the 2007 NFL Draft. He is survived by his four teammates in the secondary: Antonio Cromartie, Kyle Wilson, Eric Smith, and Jim Leonhard, as well as his boisterous head coach, Rex Ryan. A special foundation has been created in Darrelle's name, called the "Don't Get Mossed" foundation for defensive backs who get well...Mossed. This foundation was created in lieu of the soul-taking monstrosity that took place Sunday afternoon at the "New" Meadowlands Stadium in East Rutherford, New Jersey.

Witnesses say Randall Gene Moss, 33, had received numerous disrespectful comments from Mr. Revis over the course of the last 12 months, from being called a slouch and saying that he'd get locked down on "Revis Island." Sources say he'd had enough, and told his accomplice, Mr. Thomas Edward "Tom" Brady, Jr. to "throw it deep," and with a simple head-nod, Brady agreed. During the beginning of the play, Moss appeared to throw his right hand up, a sign of sheer disrespect to cornerbacks, which signals that the receiver feels he's open.

What happened next might not be suitable for underage children.


Brady fired a vertical strike approximately 40 yards down the middle of the field to a streaking Moss. Reports say that Revis was about 2-3 strides behind Moss, but the ball appeared to be sailing over the receiver's head, when all of a sudden, the man put one hand up in the air and caught the ball. He secured the ball so well that he didn't bother securing it with his second hand.

There were several reports of individuals "seeing Revis's soul leave his body" and the cornerback immediately grabbed his hamstring after the referee put both hands in the air to signal touchdown. No charges have been filed at this time, but apparently Rex Ryan has put a bounty on Mr. Brady and Mr. Moss's head.

Mr. Moss has last heard telling his teammates in fun, “What’s Revis Island? To me? It aint s**t. Next time, I may shake my d**k.”

-Ed.
http://www.edthesportsfan.com/

P.S. As a reminder, checkout the livest sports talk (and hopefully on the radio soon) show around, "The Unsportsmanlike Conduct Show" as we are live Wednesday's at 9pm Eastern at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/edthesportsfan! Download our podcasts if you missed the live show as well!

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