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Shock the World Chronicles: The Big XII Championship

Last weekend, The Three Amigos, aka Three the Hard Way, aka The Trio, aka The Mob, aka The Crew came together to shock the world in Dallas at the Big XII Championship. Luckily, B-Lew and I already live here, so we didn’t have to do anything in regards to travel. That only left Ed to make the trip from Cincinnati to D-town, and once he touched down, it was on like Donkey Kong.

People who frequent our website know that our Shock the World excursions are never solely about the event itself; moreover, it’s about the other things surrounding the actual game. Ed touched down on Friday morning, and after lolly-gagging around, I made the trip from Denton to downtown Dallas to pick the man up, and get it goin’ at the best place we know: Rudy’s.

One thing about Dallas is when you come here, you have to go to Rudy’s. It’s pretty much a done deal when you’re a guest of mine. We got to Rudy’s and proceeded to be bombarded with hustles ranging from haircuts to mixtapes to DVDs. The dude who was hustling haircuts was especially on his grind, once he saw my beard. The dude re-in iterated that his shop was right around the corner while looking at my Ed Reed/Marvin Gaye/Gilbert Arenas-inspired beard I’m rocking. After Ed was done laughing profusely, we got our food and headed over to B-Lew’s to get full, talk crazy, and make the weekend official.

After eating our food, and momentarily passing out (Rudy’s will give you the itis), we got on up and headed to a high school football playoff game, so Ed could see what B-Lew and myself have been doing every Friday night for the past three years. The man came away about as impressed as one could be, and after that, we headed downtown to act a fool, touch on random women, hit the Southside and consume bottles of Jesus Juice (well, they did; I don’t drink The Devil’s Nectar). Needless to say, Friday was a good day, but it was nothing compared to Saturday.

Seeing as it was the last title game for the Big XII, we had to make sure we had some fresh OU gear to rep our team in, so Ed and I made the trip to the Nike Outlet Store, in search of some Boomer Sooner apparel. They must have seen us coming, because they had a 40% off sale for various OU hoodies, shirts, shorts, and damn near everything else. Of course, that meant we spent more time in the store than we initially planned, but it also didn’t help that there was a gorgeous looking’ sister in the store, which pretty much meant a five-minute trek inside turned into a 15-minute trip.

We finally made it over to Cowboys Stadium for the game, and it was evident by Ed’s facial expressions that he was aghast, overjoyed, overwhelmed by what he saw. The man muttered obscenities to no one in particular, while B-Lew and I couldn’t stop laughing.

For the most part, the crowd was damn near equal, in regards to the number of fans for each team. There were plenty of Nebraska faithful in attendance, and more than enough OU supporters. No one really got out of hand, and that’s due to the man who held it down all night; none other than the member of the Event Staff that presided over our section, Herman, aka Big Herm.

Big Herm reminds me of that old man you see that tells you not to talk while you have food in your mouth, to wash your hands before dinner, and not to eat in his car while he's driving. The man was on his job all night. When people leaned against the railing, he told them to get back. If folks were standing in the aisles, Big Herm put all that to a stop and made them go back to their seats.

Hell, he even checked me once. While I was standing, I casually sat on top of my chair, and Big Herm told me I had to either stand up without leaning on my seat or sit down altogether. The thing is the man was so well-intentioned that I didn’t get angry or annoyed, and anytime someone else tried to get an attitude with him, they didn’t have a chance in hell. For all the performances of the players on the field, the most outstanding player of the entire night wasn’t even playing; it was our event staff member in Section 455, Big Herm.

The rest of the night was spent acting a pure donkey downtown again, consuming drinks, rubbing up on random women, while tippin’ a cap to others, whispering in their ear, two-steppin’ with more, and just being stupid. Fun times were definitely had, which is pretty much a guarantee anytime we shock the world.

Be easy.
-K. Masenda
P.S. As a reminder, checkout the livest sports talk (and hopefully on the radio soon) show around, "The Unsportsmanlike Conduct Show" as we are live Wednesday's at 9pm Eastern at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/edthesportsfan! Download our podcasts if you missed the live show as well!


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