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Today's Obituaries - Kyle Singler (1988-2011) and the Dookies

Kyle Edward Singler, 22, passed away on Thursday, March 24th, 2011. He was born on May 4th, 1988 in Medford, Oregon. Kyle was known for being a Detlef Schrempf impersonator and one of the stars for the Duke Blue Devils from 2007-2011, including winning the 'Most Outstanding Player' award as he led the Blue Devils to another national championship in 2010. Unfortunately, for everything the young man achieved, his legacy didn't quite end the way he wanted to.

In the 2011 NCAA Basketball national championship, Duke advanced to the Sweet 16 to face a band of hooligans from the desert simply known as "The Wildcats." In the Sweet 16, located in Anaheim, California. Duke was heavily favored versus "The Wildcats" and nary a soul gave the 'Cats a chance to win the game. Then Derrick Williams and his crew of hooligans stepped on the court.

One witness reported that watching Derrick Williams performance looked like Shang Tsung slowly taking someone's soul. It didn't seem obvious at first. Hell, Duke had the lead 44-35 going into the half. The Blue Devils pall bearers; Nolan Smith, Seth Curry, Andre Dawkins, and Ryan Kelly, were doing nothing to slow down the 6'8" Michael Beasley clone. The 25 points from Williams seemed to inspire the rest of The 'Cats, and the onslaught cometh upon The Dookies. The fury came in three stages...

The putback from Derrick Williams...


The the YUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULE from Derrick Williams and the dagger from Jamelle Horne...


If you pay attention real close...Singler yells the eff word after getting yammed on by Horne.

Shortly after the game, after all the press conferences were over, this letter was left behind right in front of Kyle Singler's locker...he was never seen from again.

If you have any idea of the whereabouts of The 'Cats please stay away as they are armed and dangerous and get ahold of the authorities. Sources say they are hiding out in the Greater Los Angeles area and can be easily mistaken for a much taller version of the group, Day 26.


A foundation has been created in honor of Kyle Singler, in honor of all of our tall Caucasian brothers who attend Duke and have an exceptional shooting ability. Please send any donations to the "Get out of the way Danny Ferry" Foundation. Thanks.

-Ed.
www.edthesportsfan.com

P.S. As a reminder, checkout the livest sports talk show around, "The Unsportsmanlike Conduct Show" as we are live Wednesday's at 9pm Eastern at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/edthesportsfan! Download our podcasts if you missed the live show as well!

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